Looking into Proverbs 31:1-3

For whoever knows me very well, you probably already know that Proverbs 31 is my absolute favorite chapter in the entire Bible. It's such a sweet picture of the guidelines of how a woman in the Lord should act: her characteristics, mannerisms, the purity of her heart, how she interacts with others, how she shines the love of Christ in all she does.

Many of you may think that the Proverbs 31 woman is only for those who are getting married...but on the contrary, I clung to this portion of scripture probably more in my singleness than I have in my engagement! It isn't just for the married woman, ladies. It's for any woman who desires to walk according to the beautiful God-ordained life that He has uniquely planned and picked out for you. God has created you so beautifully, so uniquely for His divine purpose, and you're not just another number that He created for no good reason. No, you are His bride, His beautiful daughter and princess. He has created you for a purpose..and as women, we are created differently and for different purposes than the men.

So, can the Proverbs 31 woman pertain to you? Absolutely, and it does. It's our guideline into the perfect woman. And let me tell you, we will never be perfect when we're in our fleshly bodies and apart from the Lord, but He will continue to do a sanctifying work in and through us to become more in the likeness of His image, and to develop and form into the beautiful cherished priceless women He desires us to be. It's your choice, ladies. You can choose to walk in all the beauty, fullness, satisfaction, abundance, and radiance that Christ desires for you, or, you can stumble, fall, trip, falter along the way in pride and stubbornness until you realize that God has chosen you for His divine purpose, and in order to be a woman useful for His work, submission needs to take place. We need to come to terms in realizing that we must admit our wrong, open up our hearts to our sin, and bow before the God of heaven and earth to set us free and make us clean.

So, considering Proverbs 31 is my favorite portion of scripture, and super super important to every single woman on this planet, I have prayed and decided to go through verse by verse. Each post will be only 3 verses..but I pray that you (and I) are ministered to over and over again by this sweet portion of scripture. My prayer is that your hearts and thoughts on this passage would maybe change, be reconsidered, and challenged...because I, too, know that I am no perfect woman. Yet through this portion of scripture I have cried, confessed, been humbled, been humiliated, been torn up, been encouraged, strengthened, and been in awe of how sweet and beautiful God's precious daughters are. No, I do not have all the answers. I'm no teacher, theologian, and I am certainly NOT God! I pray that my words and thoughts would encourage you, cause you to feed more upon the words of the Lord, and to be challenged to change your hearts in order to be the women God has intended you to be. My heart is for you, ladies. My heart desires and yearns to see hearts of women changed, renewed, restored, rejuvinated, awakened, enlightened, and that above all else, personal holiness would be the inmost deepest passion of your hearts. That you and I would come to realize that holiness is not just a one time thing we pray for, but rather, it is a day by day, hour by hour, continual process that we must strive hard after, just as we press on towards the goal of the call in Christ Jesus. We too must strive to press on in our endeavors for holiness.

Proverbs 31:1-3
1
   The words of King Lemuel, the utterance which his mother taught him:
2
   What, my son?
   And what, son of my womb?
   And what, son of my vows?
3
   Do not give your strength to women, nor your ways to that which destroys kings.  

Though we don't see the virtuous woman entirely until we get to verse 10, I believe these first 9 verses of Proverbs 31 are extremely important in us women understanding just how important it is to be a woman of high virtue. We see in verse 1, that we know Lemuel was king. He was ranked high in society, and what's neat about this entire portion of scripture is that his mother taught him. This reminds me of how sweet and beautiful it is for moms to encourage, admonish and teach their children in the Lord.

Titus 2:3-5 says:
"The older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things--that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed."

We see that it is our job and duty as married women with children to be mindful that it is our jobs to admonish our youngsters in the Lord. Even if you do not have children, maybe you're helping out with your youth girls at your church, or you're mentoring a younger woman you've just met, or you're being used on your campus to teach a women's Bible study. Regardless of what it may be, you are a teacher. You are responsible and going to be kept accountable for how well you know the word of God, and how you encourage and admonish it to those around you. It's an insane thing to be reminded daily of how my words can either pierce or sweeten someones day. Someday you and I will give an account for how we taught others the Word of God. That scares me. I always want to be sure I'm not just making up my own thing, or that I listen to every single woman teacher out there and take her advice...we need to test all things, and prove what is good and acceptable and truthful.

As we continue to see in verse 2 of Proverbs 31 we are aware, clearly, that Lemuel is her son. Duh, right? But it's neat to see just how much her son means to her. That is why she takes half of a chapter warning King Lemuel the dangers of running after women, but the beauty of what waiting on the Lord for a virtuous woman looks like. Towards the end of verse 2 we see that she refers to Lemuel as "son of my vows." This could mean that before he was born she (just like Hannah) may have made a vow to God. It's a portrayal of her unconditional love for her son and the desire to teach him in the Lord.

Typically in the book of Proverbs we see that the fathers are usually the ones teaching. Twice we see that a mother's teaching is referred to by a father.

Proverbs 1:8
"My son, hear the instruction of your father, and do not forsake the law of your mother."

Proverbs 6:20
"My son, keep your father's command, and do not forsake the law of your mother."

 A mother's instruction and wisdom to her children are extremely important. After all, part of her role as a wife and mom is to admonish her children while she raises them, isn't it? The instruction of a mother is very important.

Verse 3 of Proverbs 31 shows that his mother was adamant about where King Lemuel should place his strength. She says, "Do not give your strength to women, nor your ways to that which destroys kings." What is the destroyer here? Adultery. 

The key here is that we see how detrimental adultery is and can be spiritually, emotionally, and mentally to anyone and everyone. We see many times prior in Proverbs that Solomon talks about the dangers of adultery:

Proverbs 2:16-19
"To deliver you from the immoral woman, from the seductress who flatters with her words, who forsakes the companion of her youth, and forgets the covenant of her God. For her house leads down to death, and her paths to the dead; None who go to her return, nor do they regain the paths of life----"
Ladies, though this mother is warning her son about the dangers that go along with the immoral woman, all the more I'm reminded of the woman that I shouldn't be! Proverbs 31:10-31 is all about showing us the type of woman we should desire to be, but verses 1-9 contrast that by showing us a brief glimpse of who we SHOULDN'T be! This woman flatters, seduces, forsakes God, her house is the pathway to death, and no one returns who go to her. Believe it or not, you and I have the ability to be this woman, and in certain ways we become her when we don't even realize it.

Through our words, our dress, our attitudes, our actions...we can either break down the men in our lives, or we can point them ever closer to Jesus. It starts in your minds and hearts. What lies in there eventually goes outward. I've had to always remind and ask myself, "What is my purpose for this?" If your ultimate goal is to win the affection or approval of MAN then you have the wrong motives. Our desire should be to honor God in all and everything we do.

Proverbs 7:1-27
All of Proverbs 7 is on the immoral woman, the woman who flatters with her words and is seductive. We see that the ultimate goal of this women is to cause men to fall sin and carnality. Do you really want to be the product and reason as to why others around you stumble? We can either hinder others from God or we can encourage others toward God. We look to the Proverbs 7 woman and see the woman we should run far away from! 

Proverbs 22:14
"The mouth of an immoral woman is a deep pit. . . ."

  We continue to see a wise man's warning to the perils of adultery in Proverbs 23:27-28
"For a harlot is a deep pit and a seductress is a narrow well, she also lies in wait as for a victim, and increases the unfaithful among men."
To know that this woman "increases the unfaithful among men" is a chilling thought. This woman causes men to cheat on their wives, disobey their God, and be in complete and total sin. Her way is the way to death. Those that go to her are victims, they aren't friends, loved ones, or passer-byers...they are victims, those who eventually die. Scary to think about huh?

Us woman have this potential in the lives of men. We can hinder them, stumble them, cause them to fall...or we can be women who pursue holiness, walk in righteousness, and adorn ourselves in purity and uprightness. I have seen no greater beauty in any of my girl friends than I do when the light and love of Jesus shines so much, that they are beaming with the joy of Christ in their lives. Their hearts are full of the fruits of the Spirit. They always have a new exciting story to tell of how they shared the gospel with someone, or how they ministered to another lady, or how God has been working in their hearts whether pleasant or not. These woman have that 'gentle and quiet spirit' that is mentioned in 1 Peter 3. They portray Jesus and desire to walk in Him above and beyond all else. Though they are faced with adversity, tough times, and trials, they choose to walk in joy, strengthen themselves in God, and fix their eyes on eternity. Let me tell you this:

The virtuous woman is positive, optimistic, and enjoys her role in life!

She is a woman who daily clothes herself in the armor of God, taking up her cross, submitting herself and her life down at the altar morning by morning, and presses on towards those things that honor and please God.

We, too, can become women on a journey to personal holiness and virtue. God desires it for us. It's our chance and choice to make that conscience effort to walk the way of righteousness. Trust me, I definitely need the Lord to work so much in and through my heart to become the virtuous woman, friend, wife, and mother that I'm called to be in the years to come and even now! I always say that I need a heart transplant, because there is always so much yuck that doesn't please the Lord.

As we continue to look on to the coming verses of Proverbs 31, my prayer is that God would open our hearts and our eyes to the things we need to work on. Though the first three verses didn't deal with the virtuous woman, we see the type of woman that a mother warns her son about. May we as women in the Lord desire to flee from those things that don't please God, and run towards those things that bring honor and glory to His name.

Philippians 1:11

"Being filled with the fruits of righteousness which are by Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God."

the heart.

Our hearts.

They're probably one of the most fragile things we carry with us as human beings. And when I say fragile, I mean it in every way possible. It's incredible to me to think that it's in the direction of my heart to choose whether or not to keep me alive or not. Have you ever taken the time to seriously listen to someone else's heartbeat? It's a bit humbling isn't it? I know for me, when I listen to the heartbeat of someone I love it's sometimes scary. Scary, because it's surreal to think that their hearts could just stop at any moment in time. Yet I love the fact that my God holds me steps, and has the power to do with me what He desires, and with my heart.

The God of this universe created you. He designed you specifically for His purposes. Your heart...whether it's physically or spiritually is NOT your own. It's kind of like eating healthy and exercising. When you eat healthy and train your body towards exercise you begin to see good results, right? You're putting GOOD things into your body to get GOOD results.

The same is with our hearts. When we allow things to enter into our hearts, whatever they may be, we are allowing different things to happen. I always think of the Lord in this sense. The Lord created my heart. He designed it intricately for His purposes. He desires my heart. Why not let Him have it? I love what it says in Jeremiah 29:13,

"And you will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart."

It's as simple as that. What are you finding yourself searching for? What are you finding yourself placing all your time, energy, and emotion in?  Guaranteed the things you are trying to seek 'fulfillment' from are leaving you empty. God is the only one who can and will satisfy your every need. I praise my God who has supplied me with above and beyond everything I've ever needed, and not only that, but I praise Him for supplying me with ENOUGH. I'm not fulfilled, joyful, or satisfied because God has given me everything I've ever asked for. No, but rather, God hasn't given me everything I've asked for. He's given me enough!! And in that, I am blessed and fulfilled.

As women, we struggle with this don't we? We're so used to media and society telling us what's "in" or what's "trendy" or what will bring us happiness or joy. Yet, sometimes we search these things out and find they may be too expensive. Or maybe they aren't what we thought they were once we purchased them. Then there are people who tread dangerous waters and they go for extreme makeovers. Plastic surgery, over excessive tanning, things that they think may benefit them in the end when in reality...they may pay thousands of dollars on plastic surgery, come out in pain and hating it, and they've completely ruined what God has beautifully given them. It's empty satisfaction, and we will always be empty as a society if we keep believing the lie. Yes that is what it is: a lie. The devil is good at making women feel worthless and inferior isn't he?

He tries all he can to lie to us and tell us we need to be number one (pride), we need to climb the corporate ladder of success and have dominion over men (lack of submission), we need to have smaller waists, bigger lips, darker skin (vanity, vanity, all is vanity). The devil is real good at making us believe that we will always be inferior and worthless unless we strive for more.

But more of what?

The "more" that we are searching for is a vicious cycle that will leave us completely desolate. That's the whole point. We run around in circles trying one thing, being fulfilled temporarily, then crashing again trying to start over. So we start something else...that only leaves us continually down and discouraged.

That's why the Lord tells us, "You will find ME when you search for ME with all your heart."

But that's what it takes. Your whole heart. God doesn't deserve nor does He want bits and pieces of your heart. You can't give Him Sunday mornings and live Monday-Saturday for your own selfish desires and pleasures. That isn't a relationship. That's selfishness. God deserves and desires your everything. He wants your heart, so He can do a transforming work in you.

Ladies, my hearts desire lately is that we drop the continual pursuit of this world's fleshly desires and lusts, and we cling to the cross of Christ. My desire is that we pursue daily, personal, hour by hour holiness that is pleasing to the Lord, that we strive on to be women of the Word and women of prayer, and that we continually run to HIM. Not boyfriends, not beauty, not popularity, not success, not anything other than the CROSS OF CHRIST. 

As we desire to be more like Jesus we will see that the temporary things of this world will no longer be necessary desires. It's neat to see how once we grow closer to God, the things He desires for us become our desires, too. Why? Because as we draw close to Him we want to honor Him. We want to glorify Him, and as we walk in Him we will see that the things He leads us to we desire to do out of obedience.

And if not? Well, we need to do some serious heart checking before the Lord. We need to ask Him to continually do a 'heart transplant' as I'd like to call it...wiping us clean of any sins, fleshly thoughts or desires..aspiring to live holy lives acceptable unto Him.

It isn't easy, and I'll tell you that you will never be perfect. We are being sanctified daily as we walk in Christ. I can tell you now that the woman I will be in 5 years will (I hope and pray) have only grown spiritually from who I am today. And that's how it should be right?

If you start exercising and eating healthy today, you want to see progressive results in 6 months and not WORSE results, right? The same should be in our walks with the Lord.

We should desire to press on and live uprightly.

Girls, my desire for you is that you seek Christ. Seek holiness. Seek the Word. Cry out to Him in prayer. We have been designed and created by God to be beautiful women at HEART. The outward FADES, but the inward will eventually be eternal.

Spend time exercising yourself towards godliness. My prayer for all of us is that we would daily seek God to become women of holiness. We are called to be set apart from this world, bringing glory to Christ, shining His light to our lost and broken generation.

YOU are the next generation. He is raising you up to do incredible things for His kingdom...don't waste your time on things that won't benefit.

I have to ask myself, "will this bring honor to God, and benefit the ministry in any way? What are my motives." Once you're able to HONESTLY check your heart and your motives, you will begin to see things that you may need to give up to God, or things that He may be showing you.

Our walks with the Lord are designed to be beautiful, intimate, exciting and incredible. They won't always be easy, happy, or blessed....but He is FOR YOU.

He loves you. He desires you. Give Him your heart.